


Just Put the Car in Drive

by phuckingphantastic



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, High School, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:34:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23488423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phuckingphantastic/pseuds/phuckingphantastic
Summary: Seventeen year-old Dan can't sleep. He takes a midnight drive with his best friend to clear his head.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 5
Kudos: 42





	Just Put the Car in Drive

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Safe" by All Time Low.

Seventeen is a strange age.

Dan thinks that a lot.

But then, if he’s honest, Dan thinks a lot in general. 

He thinks about graduation looming in the future and how he has no idea what he’s doing with his life. He thinks about the unending vastness of the universe and how small he is in comparison. He thinks about the pile of assignments he’s been putting off and how he’ll never get them done on time. 

He thinks about big blue eyes and boys who have them. 

Dan frequently thinks himself into a spiral, until it’s all he can do just to breathe evenly and flex and unflex his fingers, feeling his pulse in his palms. Tonight is no different. 

But he wants tonight to be different – he wants, he _needs_ to feel something other than the itch of panic under his skin. Dan’s fingers search the sheets beside him until they find the smooth plastic of his phone in the darkness and soft blue light fills his bedroom. He scrolls through his contacts until he finds the name that makes his heart thud in his chest. 

_Hey._

Phil must have been awake, too, because three little dots instantly pop up under Dan’s text. 

_Hi :)_

Dan is endlessly grateful to have a best friend as nocturnal is he is. 

_Are you sleeping?_

Technically, Dan already knows the answer, but he figures it’s still polite to ask.

_No._

_Want to go for a drive?_

Dan doesn’t have wait to know what Phil’s answer will be. He creeps down the stairs, grabs his keys from the bowl by the front door, and slips out into the night. 

***

Phil’s house is nicer than Dan’s. It’s two stories of brick and white paint with a perfectly manicured lawn and a basketball hoop in the driveway. Dan had spent countless hours with Phil in that driveway over the years, watching him take and miss shots until Phil eventually admitted he would never be any good. At 6’2, he may look the part, but he’s as unathletic as they come.

The front light flickers on briefly and then Phil is slipping out the front door, stumbling a little as he climbs down the steps. His black hair is pushed into a quiff high above his forehead and he’s clad in a faded blue t-shirt and plaid pajama bottoms. 

He makes Dan feel a little breathless. 

Dan stares straight ahead and taps his fingers on the steering wheel as Phil opens the door and climbs in the car. Without a word, Dan puts the car in drive and breathes in the familiar woodsy smell that Phil seems to bring with him wherever he goes. It’s a secret comfort for Dan. 

Phil appears to have picked up on Dan’s weird mood. He leans his head on the window and turns his face toward Dan. 

“Are we going anywhere in particular, tonight?”

Dan can’t risk looking and giving away the emotions written into the lines of his face. His eyes stay fixed on the road, tracking the glow of streetlights in the dark. 

“Just need to get out of here for a bit.” 

Phil nods and turns to gaze out the window, the lights from outside casting shadows on his face. 

Dan breathes in. And out. 

***

They end up more than a little ways out of town. The water isn’t quite warm this time of year, but the sand feels nice under Dan’s bare feet. Phil’s pajama bottoms are dragging just a bit, but he doesn’t seem to mind. They spread out the towel rummaged from the trunk of Dan’s car, and lie next to each other, breathing in the salt as inky black waves crash in the distance. 

“Do you think about the future?” Dan asks. Eye contact seems too intense tonight, so he settles for staring up at the sky. It’s mostly overcast, but he can see the hint of stars speckled beneath the hazy grey. 

Phil props himself up on one elbow so that he’s turned towards Dan and traces patterns into the faded beach towel. “Yeah. No more than anyone else, I suppose.”

Dan pauses. 

“I think about it a lot. Maybe too much.” He risks a glance at Phil and sees his mouth quirk up just a bit. 

“You think about everything too much.” 

Dan inhales and lets the salt fills his lungs. It stings just a little. “I just…,” Suddenly, he flips on his side and stares into Phil’s eyes intensely. 

“I can’t stop thinking about my life and how small it is in the grand scheme of things and I’m supposed to choose a career and do something meaningful with my life, but really when you think about it, everything is actually meaningless and we’re all just killing time until we eventually die… and I’m always thinking about you and when you’re going to decide you’ve had enough of me and what would I do if we don’t stay friends in university… ” He runs out of breath and out of steam without being sure he’s really said anything at all.

Phil seems to understand, though. He’s had seventeen years to learn the intricacies of Dan.

Phil reaches out and laces their fingers together.

“It’s gonna be alright, Dan,” he whispers. “You just need to stop thinking for once.” 

Dan has had a lifetime of thinking and overthinking, hoping and dreaming for this moment. In the end, it turns out he didn’t need to put that much thought into it after all. 

Their lips meet and it’s chaste and sweet. Salty like the ocean air. Phil wraps his arm around Dan’s waist and pulls him closer until they’re both gasping for breath. They lay back against the towel and talk about nothing until the suns starts to rise in the sky. 

In the morning, when Dan’s parents ask about his red-rimmed eyes over breakfast, he’ll let a bit of truth slip through and tell them he couldn’t sleep. They don’t need to know about the two sets of sandy footprints on the floor of his car.


End file.
